Pick Me! Pick Me!

My favorite John Grisham novel is The Runaway Jury. So when I received my summons in the mail last month I had visions of "Juror #2" dancing around in my head. For one person to have that much influence and power over a verdict is really exciting. And to put bad guys in jail and give their victims victory would be very satisfying.

And maybe I'm already secretly being watched by jury consultants. Maybe that toothless old man that came up to me and Little pup in Walmart the other day and told me that "there's nothin' prettier than a momma pushing her baby in a buggy" was actually a jury expert. Maybe when the guy in Subway asked me what I wanted on my sub and I said "the works" and he said "banana peppers and jalapenos?" and I said "no" because THE WORKS DOES NOT INCLUDE BANANA PEPPERS AND JALAPENOS and he smirked and said "Ah ha" well, maybe that was a test. And maybe there were hidden photographers everywhere last week when I was supposed to be picking up a pizza for WD and the pups, but I stopped at Sonic first for a chocolate shake then went into Atwoods and looked at baby ducks until WD called wondering what was taking me so long.

Hmmmm. Maybe.

Reason #87

I was looking through some pictures yesterday and found this one tucked into the folder of shame. It was right next to a particularly embarrassing picture of WD that I will share when he makes me really, really mad. Be nice, WD. But as for this picture, this is what Little pup had for breakfast the morning after Halloween. Does that make me a bad mother? Just look at all those empty calories. And I don't even want to know the amount of sugar in that bowl. But how can I say no to Little pup? Especially when he tells me every day, "Mommy, I love every inch of you." Could you say no to that? I didn't think so.

Snuggle

Wait...What's this?...Why Elliott Sadler does sell snuggle fabric softener.


Countdown to Daytona: 10 weeks

What I Know For Sure

If you've ever read Oprah's magazine, then the title above will ring a bell. It's the title of a recurring column where she writes what she knows for sure about love, fullfillness, inhibitions, wisdom, intellectual freedom, etc. And while I'm not as eloquent as Oprah, nor are my topics as lofty as hers, here are a few things that I know for sure:


I know that men are incapable of multi-tasking.


I know that when a toddler says yes he means no, and when he says no he means yes.


I know that it's not a good idea to have Taco Bell past 10 p.m. when you're over the age of 30.


I know that you should never watch an episode of The Wonder Years when you have pms.


I know that it will rain the day after you wash your car and that your toddler's diaper will leak the day after you wash sheets.


I know that Oprah could buy and sell me for copyright infringement.

Bumps And Bruises

We have another black eye here at the Home of the Lazy Dog. Big pup ran into the entertainment center and his right eye is bruised and a little puffy. Thankfully, it's not as bad as the time he fell off the bouncing bull. And then last night, Big pup and Little pup were allegedly playing together on the bed and allegedly they were both pushing each other and allegedly Big pup pushed Little pup and allegedly Little pup fell backwards onto the bed then to the floor. Allegedly. All I know is by the time I got in there Little pup was lying on the floor crying and WD was questioning Big pup on his whereabouts on the night of December 4 at approximately 6:04 p.m.

I think I'm about ready to wrap them both in bubble wrap and never let them leave the house.

Snickerdoodles

When I was a kid my parents didn't have a vcr or cable television. So when shows like How the Grinch Stole Christmas or The Wizard of Oz came on, it was quite an event in our house. We couldn't record it to watch it over and over, nor could we catch it on a TBS week long marathon. Back then, if you missed it, you were just out of luck. You had to wait a whole year to see it again. It was a big deal in our family. Momma would either make popcorn or fried pies. Or sometimes she would make cookies--either oatmeal or snickerdoodles--and Angie and I would get to lick the beaters.


So when A Charlie Brown Christmas came on TV last night, I got out the ingredients and my electric mixer and the boys helped me make some snickerdoodles. And some memories of their own.


Big pup: Can I have one of those? (pointing to the beaters on the mixer)
Me: Well, if you're not worried about salmonella, you can.
Big pup: I'm not!
Little pup: I'm not, either!
Me: Okay, go ahead.

1/2 cup butter
1 cup sugar
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1 egg
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
cinnamon-sugar

In a mixing bowl beat the butter with a mixer for 30 seconds. Add the cup of sugar and baking soda. Beat till combined. Beat in egg and vanilla till combined. Then beat in flour till combined. Cover and chill for 1 hour.
Shape dough into 1 inch balls and roll balls in cinnamon-sugar to coat. Place 2 inches apart on an ungreased cookie sheet. Bake in a 375 degree oven for 10 minutes. Let cool. But not too much. They're best warm.

Mmmm....Butter

Would you buy country crock butter if Elliott Sadler told you to? No? Snuggle fabric softener? Maybe?

Countdown to Daytona: 11 weeks.